May I ask you to?

You use May I ask you to? right before stating what you want someone to do. It’s a preamble, a polite buffer. You'll follow it with the action verb in its base form. For example, May I ask you to pass the salt? or May I ask you to review this document? It works best when the request isn't urgent or a matter of life and death. Think of it as your default polite request setting.

This expression leans formal, but it's not stiff or old-fashioned. It's appropriate for professional settings like emails or meetings. You can also use it with people you don't know well. It's also perfectly fine in slightly more formal social situations, like asking an acquaintance for a small favor. It’s like wearing a nice shirt – suitable for many occasions, but maybe not for lounging on the couch watching Netflix.

• In a coffee shop: "May I ask you to turn down the music just a bit? It's a little loud for my call."
• In an office email: "May I ask you to please proofread this report before it goes out?"
• To a colleague: "May I ask you to cover the front desk for ten minutes while I grab some water?"
• On a video call: "May I ask you to share your screen so we can all see the presentation?"
• Asking for directions: "Excuse me, may I ask you to point me towards the nearest train station?"

Use this when you need to ask someone to do something and you want to be extra polite. It's perfect for situations where you don't know the person well, or you're in a professional environment. It's also great when the favor might be a bit inconvenient for them. If you're asking your boss for a favor, or a stranger for directions, this is your phrase. It’s like using a gift-wrap for your request.

Avoid this with close friends or family for everyday tasks. They might find it a bit too formal or even sarcastic, like you're mocking them. Don't use it for urgent, critical requests where directness is needed. Saying "May I ask you to stop that car before it hits the pedestrian?" sounds ridiculous. Stick to simpler, more direct language in emergencies. Also, don't use it if you're already annoyed – the politeness might sound fake.

A frequent slip-up is mixing up the verb form. People sometimes use the -ing form or the past tense. Remember, it’s always the base form of the verb. Another error is using it in situations that are too casual. Imagine asking your roommate, "May I ask you to take out the trash?" They might think you're being passive-aggressive or just plain weird. Stick to Can you or Could you with close pals.

• ✗ May I ask you to passed the salt? → ✓ May I ask you to pass the salt?
• ✗ May I ask you to be passing the salt? → ✓ May I ask you to pass the salt?
• ✗ May I ask you to... hey, could you grab me a beer? (Mixing formality)

While May I ask you to? is quite standard, you'll hear variations. Could you possibly...? is very similar in politeness. Would you mind...? is another polite option, often used when the request might be a slight imposition. For a slightly less formal but still polite feel, Would you be able to...? works well. In super casual settings, friends might just say Can you...? or even just state the request directly, maybe with a pleading look.