어떻게 지내세요?

You use this phrase right after the initial 안녕하세요 (hello). It serves as a perfect conversation bridge. In English, we often say 'How are you?' as a throwaway. In Korean, this phrase invites a real answer. You can use it in person, over the phone, or in a polite text message. It fits perfectly when there has been a small gap in contact. If you saw them five minutes ago, it might feel a bit dramatic!

Use this with people you have a polite relationship with. This includes colleagues you don't see every day. It works for neighbors or distant relatives. It is great for a former teacher or a senior student. If you haven't talked to someone in a week, this is your best friend. It sounds professional yet caring in a business email. It also works well when meeting a friend's parents for the second time.

Do not use this with your absolute best friends. It will sound like you are suddenly acting like a stranger! For close friends, use the casual 어떻게 지내?. Also, avoid using it with total strangers, like a cashier. They might wonder why you are getting so personal about their life. It is also a bit too heavy for someone you see every single hour. Imagine asking your roommate this every time they walk into the kitchen. They might think you've lost your memory!

Korean culture places a huge emphasis on the 'we' rather than the 'I'. Asking about someone's life is a way to maintain the social bond. It is part of 'Cheong' (social glue/affection). Historically, Koreans often asked about food or sleep to check on health. This phrase is the modern, standard version of that care. It shows you recognize the time that has passed between you. It acknowledges that the other person has a life outside of your interaction.

If you want to be very casual with friends, say 어떻게 지내?. If you are talking to someone much older or in a high position, use 어떻게 지내셨어요? (How have you been? - past tense). For a very formal business setting, you might hear 어떻게 지내십니까?. If you want to sound extra sweet, you can ask 잘 지내고 계세요? which means 'Are you doing well?'. Each version changes the 'vibe' but keeps the heart of the question the same.