A1 Expression Neutral 2 min read

对不起。

Duibuqi.

I'm sorry.

Literally: Facing not up (cannot face someone due to shame)

In 15 Seconds

  • The standard, most common way to say 'I'm sorry'.
  • Used for genuine mistakes, lateness, or causing minor trouble.
  • Literally means 'cannot face you' due to feeling ashamed.
  • Appropriate for both friends and professional settings.

Meaning

This is the classic way to say 'I'm sorry' when you've made a mistake or let someone down. It carries a bit more weight than a casual 'excuse me' and shows you truly feel bad.

Key Examples

3 of 6
1

Being late for a lunch date

对不起,我迟到了。

Sorry, I'm late.

<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M14.828 14.828a4 4 0 01-5.656 0M9 10h.01M15 10h.01M21 12a9 9 0 11-18 0 9 9 0 0118 0z"/></svg>
2

Bumping into a stranger on the subway

对不起,没关系吧?

I'm sorry, are you okay?

<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M14.828 14.828a4 4 0 01-5.656 0M9 10h.01M15 10h.01M21 12a9 9 0 11-18 0 9 9 0 0118 0z"/></svg>
3

A formal apology to a manager

老板,对不起,我做错了。

Boss, I'm sorry, I made a mistake.

<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M21 13.255A23.931 23.931 0 0112 15c-3.183 0-6.22-.62-9-1.745M16 6V4a2 2 0 00-2-2h-4a2 2 0 00-2 2v2m4 6h.01M5 20h14a2 2 0 002-2V8a2 2 0 00-2-2H5a2 2 0 00-2 2v10a2 2 0 002 2z"/></svg>
🌍

Cultural Background

Apologizing is essential for maintaining harmony. Similar to China, but often uses '不好意思' even more frequently.

💡

Tone matters

Say it with a sincere face.

In 15 Seconds

  • The standard, most common way to say 'I'm sorry'.
  • Used for genuine mistakes, lateness, or causing minor trouble.
  • Literally means 'cannot face you' due to feeling ashamed.
  • Appropriate for both friends and professional settings.

What It Means

对不起 (duì bù qǐ) is the gold standard for apologies in Chinese. Literally, it means you 'cannot face' the person because of your actions. It suggests a sense of debt or shame. You are admitting you did something wrong. It is more sincere than a simple 'my bad.'

How To Use It

Use it when you are late for a coffee date. Use it when you accidentally step on someone's foot. You can place it at the start of a sentence. For example, 对不起,我忘了 means 'Sorry, I forgot.' It is a complete thought on its own too. Just say it with a small nod. It shows you take responsibility for the hiccup.

When To Use It

You should use this in most everyday social mishaps. Use it at a restaurant if you spill water. Use it in a meeting if you interrupt someone. It works perfectly when texting a friend you've kept waiting. It is the 'safety' phrase for any social blunder. If you feel a tiny bit of guilt, this is your go-to.

When NOT To Use It

Don't use it to mean 'Excuse me, may I pass?' For that, use 请让一下. Don't use it to ask for a favor or get attention. That is usually 不好意思. If you are at a funeral, 对不起 might sound like you caused the death! Use words of sympathy instead. Avoid it for very minor things like a tiny sneeze.

Cultural Background

Chinese culture values 'face' and social harmony. Saying 对不起 restores that balance. Historically, it implies you are too ashamed to look them in the eye. In modern times, it is less dramatic but still very polite. It is a bridge that mends small cracks in relationships. It shows you are a person of good character and 'ren' (humanity).

Common Variations

If you want to sound extra sorry, add 非常 (fēicháng) in front. That makes it 'Very sorry.' If you are talking to a boss, use 真对不起. For tiny mistakes with friends, many people swap this for 不好意思. It's like the difference between 'I'm sorry' and 'My apologies.' Both work, but one feels a bit more official.

Usage Notes

This phrase is neutral and safe for all ages and social classes. The main 'gotcha' is using it for 'Excuse me' when you just want to ask a question—stick to `请问` for that.

💡

Tone matters

Say it with a sincere face.

Examples

6
#1 Being late for a lunch date
<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M14.828 14.828a4 4 0 01-5.656 0M9 10h.01M15 10h.01M21 12a9 9 0 11-18 0 9 9 0 0118 0z"/></svg>

对不起,我迟到了。

Sorry, I'm late.

A very common and necessary use for social punctuality.

#2 Bumping into a stranger on the subway
<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M14.828 14.828a4 4 0 01-5.656 0M9 10h.01M15 10h.01M21 12a9 9 0 11-18 0 9 9 0 0118 0z"/></svg>

对不起,没关系吧?

I'm sorry, are you okay?

Polite way to check on someone after a physical bump.

#3 A formal apology to a manager
<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M21 13.255A23.931 23.931 0 0112 15c-3.183 0-6.22-.62-9-1.745M16 6V4a2 2 0 00-2-2h-4a2 2 0 00-2 2v2m4 6h.01M5 20h14a2 2 0 002-2V8a2 2 0 00-2-2H5a2 2 0 00-2 2v10a2 2 0 002 2z"/></svg>

老板,对不起,我做错了。

Boss, I'm sorry, I made a mistake.

Directly taking responsibility in a professional setting.

#4 Accidentally eating a friend's snack
<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M14.828 14.828a4 4 0 01-5.656 0M9 10h.01M15 10h.01M21 12a9 9 0 11-18 0 9 9 0 0118 0z"/></svg>

对不起!我以为这是我的。

Sorry! I thought this was mine.

A lighthearted but necessary apology for a funny mistake.

#5 Texting a partner after a fight
<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M4.318 6.318a4.5 4.5 0 000 6.364L12 20.364l7.682-7.682a4.5 4.5 0 00-6.364-6.364L12 7.636l-1.318-1.318a4.5 4.5 0 00-6.364 0z"/></svg>

亲爱的,对不起,我不应该那样说。

Honey, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that.

Used to mend emotional connections and express regret.

#6 Spilling a drink on someone's shoes
<svg class="w-5 h-5" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" viewBox="0 0 24 24" aria-hidden="true"><path stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" stroke-width="2" d="M14.828 14.828a4 4 0 01-5.656 0M9 10h.01M15 10h.01M21 12a9 9 0 11-18 0 9 9 0 0118 0z"/></svg>

真对不起,我帮你擦擦。

I'm so sorry, let me help you wipe it.

Adding '真' (really) increases the sincerity of the apology.

Test Yourself

Choose the best phrase for bumping into someone.

You bump into someone. What do you say?

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: 对不起

对不起 is the correct apology.

🎉 Score: /1

Visual Learning Aids

Apology Intensity Spectrum

Casual

Minor inconveniences

不好意思 (bù hǎo yì si)

Neutral

Standard sincere apology

对不起 (duì bù qǐ)

Formal

Deep regret/Official

抱歉 (bào qiàn)

When to say Duibuqi

对不起

Lateness

Late for a meeting

Accidents

Spilling coffee

📧

Mistakes

Wrong email sent

👤

Social Blunders

Forgetting a name

Practice Bank

1 exercises
Choose the best phrase for bumping into someone. Choose A1

You bump into someone. What do you say?

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: 对不起

对不起 is the correct apology.

🎉 Score: /1

Frequently Asked Questions

1 questions

It is neutral.

Related Phrases

🔗

不好意思

similar

Excuse me / embarrassed

🔄

抱歉

synonym

Apologetic

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