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B1 Intermediate English 14:31 Educational

Want to be happy? Be grateful | David Steindl-Rast

TED · 3,741,762 views · Added 1 month ago

Learning Stats

B1

CEFR Level

5/10

Difficulty

Subtitles (243 segments)

00:12

There is something you know about me,

00:16

something very personal,

00:20

and there is something I know about every one of you

00:24

and that's very central to your concerns.

00:28

There is something that we know

00:31

about everyone we meet anywhere in the world, on the street,

00:37

that is the very mainspring of whatever they do

00:42

and whatever they put up with.

00:46

And that is that all of us want to be happy.

00:52

In this, we are all together.

00:55

How we imagine our happiness, that differs from one another,

01:00

but it's already a lot that we have all in common,

01:05

that we want to be happy.

01:09

Now my topic is gratefulness.

01:12

What is the connection between happiness and gratefulness?

01:19

Many people would say, well, that's very easy.

01:22

When you are happy, you are grateful.

01:26

But think again.

01:29

Is it really the happy people that are grateful?

01:35

We all know quite a number of people

01:38

who have everything that it would take to be happy,

01:42

and they are not happy,

01:44

because they want something else or they want more of the same.

01:50

And we all know people who have lots of misfortune,

01:57

misfortune that we ourselves would not want to have,

02:00

and they are deeply happy.

02:03

They radiate happiness. You are surprised.

02:07

Why? Because they are grateful.

02:10

So it is not happiness that makes us grateful.

02:14

It's gratefulness that makes us happy.

02:17

If you think it's happiness that makes you grateful,

02:20

think again.

02:22

It's gratefulness that makes you happy.

02:26

Now, we can ask,

02:28

what do we really mean by gratefulness?

02:32

And how does it work?

02:37

I appeal to your own experience.

02:39

We all know from experience how it goes.

02:43

We experience something that's valuable to us.

02:48

Something is given to us that's valuable to us.

02:53

And it's really given.

02:55

These two things have to come together.

02:58

It has to be something valuable, and it's a real gift.

03:03

You haven't bought it. You haven't earned it.

03:06

You haven't traded it in. You haven't worked for it.

03:09

It's just given to you.

03:10

And when these two things come together,

03:13

something that's really valuable to me and I realize it's freely given,

03:18

then gratefulness spontaneously rises in my heart,

Full subtitles available in the video player

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