Meaning
To choose not to do something.
Cultural Background
Danes value 'direkte tale' (direct speech) but also 'hygge' (comfort). 'Lad være' is a firm but socially accepted way to maintain peace without being overly aggressive. Across Norway and Sweden, similar 'let be' constructions exist, but the Danish 'med' is a specific marker of the Jutlandic and Insular dialects that became standard. In Danish flat hierarchies, a boss might use 'Jeg synes, vi skal lade være med...' to suggest a direction without sounding like a dictator. Danish parenting often focuses on 'selvregulering' (self-regulation). Parents use 'lade være' to encourage children to make the choice to stop themselves.
The 'Det' Shortcut
If someone asks you to do something and you want to say 'I'll pass' or 'I won't', just say 'Jeg lader være'. You don't need the 'med' if there's no verb following.
Don't over-negate
Remember that 'ikke kunne lade være med' is a positive action (you DO the thing). If you want to say you CAN stop, say 'Jeg kan godt lade være'.
Meaning
To choose not to do something.
The 'Det' Shortcut
If someone asks you to do something and you want to say 'I'll pass' or 'I won't', just say 'Jeg lader være'. You don't need the 'med' if there's no verb following.
Don't over-negate
Remember that 'ikke kunne lade være med' is a positive action (you DO the thing). If you want to say you CAN stop, say 'Jeg kan godt lade være'.
Polite Refusal
Using 'Jeg tror, jeg lader være' is a very polite, Danish way to say 'No thanks' to an invitation or a suggestion.
Test Yourself
Fill in the missing words to say 'I can't help but smile'.
Jeg kan ikke ______ ______ ______ at smile.
The phrase 'ikke at kunne lade være med at...' is the standard way to say 'cannot help but' in Danish.
Which sentence is a correct way to tell someone to stop annoying you?
Vælg den rigtige sætning:
'Lad være med det der' is the idiomatic way to say 'Stop that!'. 'Lad mig være' means 'Leave me alone'.
Match the sentence to the situation.
Situation: You are on a diet and someone offers you cake.
This sentence expresses the intention to refrain from an action (eating cake).
Complete the dialogue.
A: Hvorfor købte du ikke den nye iPhone? B: Jeg ______ ______ ______, fordi den var for dyr.
Since the question is in the past tense (købte), the answer must also be in the past tense (lod).
🎉 Score: /4
Visual Learning Aids
Common Uses
Habits
- • Smoking
- • Sugar
- • Late nights
Social
- • Laughing
- • Interfering
- • Gossiping
Practice Bank
4 exercisesJeg kan ikke ______ ______ ______ at smile.
The phrase 'ikke at kunne lade være med at...' is the standard way to say 'cannot help but' in Danish.
Vælg den rigtige sætning:
'Lad være med det der' is the idiomatic way to say 'Stop that!'. 'Lad mig være' means 'Leave me alone'.
Situation: You are on a diet and someone offers you cake.
This sentence expresses the intention to refrain from an action (eating cake).
A: Hvorfor købte du ikke den nye iPhone? B: Jeg ______ ______ ______, fordi den var for dyr.
Since the question is in the past tense (købte), the answer must also be in the past tense (lod).
🎉 Score: /4
Frequently Asked Questions
10 questionsYes, but 'stoppe' is more about ending an action that has started. 'Lade være med' is better for choosing not to start.
It depends on the tone. To a child, it's a standard command. To a stranger, it's quite blunt. Use 'Vil du ikke nok lade være' to be more polite.
It's a preposition that links the 'letting be' to the specific object or action. Think of it as 'letting be *with* that activity'.
Yes, if a verb follows. 'Jeg lader være med *at* spise'.
No, for that use 'Lad mig være' (without 'med').
You say 'Jeg kunne ikke lade være'.
It's neutral, so it's fine, but 'undlade' is more professional.
The past tense is 'lod være med'.
Yes, 'det' acts as a pronoun for the action you want someone to stop.
Very! Many Danish pop songs use it to talk about love and habits.
Related Phrases
at holde op med
synonymTo stop doing something
at undlade
specialized formTo refrain/omit
at lade som om
similarTo pretend
at lade ligge
similarTo leave it alone / let it be
at afholde sig fra
synonymTo abstain from
