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B1 Intermediate English 11:35 Educational

Anthony Jeselnik - Funniest Dark Jokes Compilation

The Comedy Square · 2,122,232 views · Added 1 month ago

Learning Stats

B1

CEFR Level

5/10

Difficulty

Subtitles (267 segments)

00:00

[Music]

00:05

i am aware

00:07

that i must seem like a tough cold son

00:09

of a [ __ ] up here

00:11

in fact

00:13

the only time i've ever cried in public

00:16

in my entire life

00:18

was at my mom's funeral

00:21

i might be

00:22

a tough cold son of a [ __ ]

00:25

but that doesn't mean i'm not also

00:27

one hell of an actor

00:32

my baby brother is in high school now

00:34

and we're close

00:35

but sometimes let's try to take

00:36

advantage of that you know

00:38

a couple months ago he calls me up he

00:40

goes anthony i just cut school for no

00:42

reason

00:43

and now i need you to write me a sick

00:45

note

00:46

and then forge dad's signature and make

00:48

it good

00:50

i did my best but i'm horrible and stuff

00:52

like that

00:53

teachers took one look at the note and

00:54

said mikey

00:56

you expect me to believe this

00:58

you don't have aids

01:02

[Laughter]

01:08

oh fantastic if you guys like that

01:10

answer

01:14

i've got some great news

01:16

you're going to love

01:18

this next aids joke

01:21

i just got an email from an

01:23

ex-girlfriend of mine telling me that

01:25

she has aids

01:28

and i didn't

01:37

i like your style

01:42

i just got an email from my

01:43

ex-girlfriend telling me that she has

01:45

aids

01:46

and i didn't know how to comfort her

01:48

so i just wrote back i know

01:55

[Applause]

01:57

yesterday i accidentally uh

01:59

hit a little kid with my car

02:05

it wasn't serious

02:08

nobody saw me

02:16

and people get weird when kids die

02:22

no that's a fact

02:24

that's a fact

02:27

like about a month ago

Full subtitles available in the video player

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The Comedy Square

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