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Michael McIntyre's Best Stories | Stand Up Comedy
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الترجمة (564 مقاطع)
i've never really been to scandinavia
before the hotel was just all
minimalist you know just everything was
just what you needed you know just a bed
and sink but it was good because
normally hotels they get very confusing
now you
don't you never know where the light
switch is for stuff or they have these
sensor lights now
we go in the bathroom and it just comes
on everything oh that's good
but then you're on the loo and it goes
off and you have to try and get it back
[Music]
it's been so long since i've stayed in
the hotel they just had a normal tap
that you turn on and you turn off but
they couldn't work the taps i'm in this
hotel room in oslo
trying to get water
and i called maintenance and the guy
just came up when you do this you do
that
idiot
so i was very happy to be in this quite
simple hotel room in norway
and what i really liked was just one
switch it's got one master switch next
to the door that control the whole room
so i thought oh this is so easy because
normally you know you've got to find the
switch for
different sections of the hotel room
then the lamps next to the bed you don't
know if it's on the neck
you know you've got fiddling from the
neck or you look at the wire is it on
the wire
so i was so thrilled that just one light
turned everything off one switch turned
everything up so i went
and this is after my gig i was a little
i'd had a couple of drinks and it was
late
and i thought i'll just switch that off
obviously bedtime it's hard to get back
to the bed now because it's dark
i'm doing that walk when you're
expecting to hit something
so i got into my bed and unbeknownst to
me i
have no idea why this was there there
was a switch behind the pillow
that also controlled the same lights i
lay in the bed
and then all the nights in the room went
on
i thought somebody would come in hello
hello
is there somebody there hello well
that's very peculiar
so i went over to the gym
turn the lights off dark again make my
way slowly
[Music]
got myself in lay as soon as my head hit
the pillar
the lights went back
some earth is going on so i marched back
quite quickly
i convinced myself some kind of sensor
so this time i was very
very careful
[Music]
i slowly got to the bed and nothing
happened i was like oh this is fine
rolled over the light went down again
so i phoned maintenance now bear in mind
this man that maintenance already thinks
i am completely mental as a person
so i call him i'm lying there now in the
light and look there's a knock on the
door i go oh thank you thank you for
coming
he said is it taps again no the taxi
fire
watch this the lights keep going on and
i don't know i don't know why their
mother's something wrong
after a certain amount of fine they just
go on okay i'm gonna show you all right
so i turn the light off and i'm standing
in the dark with this norwegian man
follow me come with me i'm holding him a
bit come on
come on come with me
all right all right are you there yes
just standing
just gonna get into the bed okay
i lay in the bed and nothing happened
i'm just lying
i'm lying in the dark and he just stood
there and went
please let me go but i want to go so
he was knocking over furniture he made
his way up to the door in the dark i
rolled over and the lights went
on
i was going to tell you about my private
life um
i've had some good news recently is that
i've got um
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Michael McIntyre
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