المعنى
A polite way to apologize or express regret, often implying humility.
خلفية ثقافية
The phrase is a cornerstone of Ta'arof. It's often used even when the speaker has done nothing wrong, simply to show respect. In the capital, 'sharmandeh' is used rapidly and frequently in traffic and business, often losing its deep meaning and becoming a simple 'sorry.' Shopkeepers use 'sharmandeh' to decline a discount request. It signals that they've reached their limit but still value the customer. While understood, 'sharmandeh' is less common in Kabul than in Tehran. Afghans might prefer 'bebakhshen' or 'mote'assef am.'
The 'Hand on Chest' Move
When saying 'sharmandeh,' place your right hand over your heart and tilt your head slightly. This makes the apology feel 100% authentic to an Iranian.
Don't Overdo It
If you say 'sharmandeh' for every single tiny thing, you might come across as insecure rather than polite. Save it for actual social debts.
المعنى
A polite way to apologize or express regret, often implying humility.
The 'Hand on Chest' Move
When saying 'sharmandeh,' place your right hand over your heart and tilt your head slightly. This makes the apology feel 100% authentic to an Iranian.
Don't Overdo It
If you say 'sharmandeh' for every single tiny thing, you might come across as insecure rather than polite. Save it for actual social debts.
Ta'arof Logic
Remember, if someone says 'sharmandeh' to you, you should reply with 'Doshmanet sharmandeh' (May your enemy be ashamed), which means 'Don't worry about it!'
Texting Shortcut
In Persian SMS/WhatsApp, people often just write 'شرمنده' (Sharmandeh) without the 'am.' It's perfectly fine for friends.
اختبر نفسك
Complete the sentence with the correct form of 'sharmandeh'.
خیلی _______ که دیروز به مهمانی شما نیامدم.
The speaker is talking about themselves (I am ashamed), so '-am' is required.
Match the response to the situation.
Situation: Someone gives you a very expensive gift you didn't expect.
In Ta'arof, 'sharmandeh kardid' is the standard way to accept a generous gift.
Which phrase is most appropriate for a minor social slip like being 5 minutes late?
...
'Sharmandeh-am' is the perfect level of apology for minor lateness.
Fill in the missing line.
A: می تونی به من کمک کنی؟ B: ________، الان باید برم سر کار.
'Sharmandeh' is used here to politely decline a request.
🎉 النتيجة: /4
وسائل تعلم بصرية
When to say Sharmandeh-am
Mistakes
- • Being late
- • Forgetting a name
- • Spilling a drink
Refusals
- • Declining a party
- • Saying no to a loan
- • Can't help with work
Gratitude
- • Receiving a gift
- • Being treated to dinner
- • Getting a big favor
Bebakhshid vs. Sharmandeh
بنك التمارين
4 تمارينخیلی _______ که دیروز به مهمانی شما نیامدم.
The speaker is talking about themselves (I am ashamed), so '-am' is required.
Situation: Someone gives you a very expensive gift you didn't expect.
In Ta'arof, 'sharmandeh kardid' is the standard way to accept a generous gift.
...
'Sharmandeh-am' is the perfect level of apology for minor lateness.
A: می تونی به من کمک کنی؟ B: ________، الان باید برم سر کار.
'Sharmandeh' is used here to politely decline a request.
🎉 النتيجة: /4
الأسئلة الشائعة
10 أسئلةNot at all! It's very common among friends to show you care about their feelings.
Yes, if it's a small item. If it's expensive, follow it up with an offer to pay.
'Bebakhshid' is 'Excuse me' (functional). 'Sharmandeh' is 'I feel bad/ashamed' (emotional/social).
The most common reply is 'Doshmanet sharmandeh' (May your enemy be ashamed) or 'In harfiye?' (What kind of talk is that? / Don't say that!).
No! In Persian culture, admitting 'shame' is a sign of being a 'good' and 'polite' person.
Yes, if you are late or don't know an answer, but keep it formal: 'Sharmandeh-am, dar in zamineh ettela'ati nadaram.'
It's most common in Iran. In Afghanistan and Tajikistan, other forms of apology are more frequent.
They don't! They say it when *receiving* a gift to show they feel they don't deserve such kindness.
Yes, 'Sharmande-mool' is very casual slang used by some youth, but it's better to stick to the standard version.
No, use 'Bebakhshid' for that. 'Sharmandeh' is for when you've done something (or can't do something).
عبارات ذات صلة
ببخشید
similarExcuse me / Forgive me
متاسفم
similarI am sorry / I regret
پوزش می خواهم
formalI seek your pardon
خجالت کشیدم
similarI felt shy/embarrassed
شرمسار
specialized formDeeply ashamed
معذرت می خواهم
synonymI apologize
