Put up with (Tolerate)
Grammar Rule in 30 Seconds
Use 'put up with' to describe enduring something unpleasant without complaining, even when you don't like it.
- Always keep 'put', 'up', and 'with' together; never split them with an object.
- Follow 'with' with a noun or a gerund (-ing form), never a base verb.
- Use it for people, situations, or behaviors that are annoying but unavoidable.
Overview
"Put up with" means you accept a bad thing. You stay quiet even if you are unhappy.
You are patient because you must be. You cannot change the situation.
Example: "My street is loud. I put up with the noise." It means living with something difficult.
How This Grammar Works
up with conveys the idea of confronting and enduring something directly.Formation Pattern
up with can be a:
I can’t put up with this noise any longer.
They had to put up with the company’s strict policies for years.
She struggles to put up with him during long meetings.
We simply couldn't put up with it anymore, so we left.
My parents put up with my practicing the drums late at night.
Employees often put up with working overtime without extra pay.
Put:
You put up with a lot at that job. (Present Simple)
We put up with their complaints all evening. (Past Simple)
They’ve put up with that faulty equipment for weeks. (Present Perfect)
When To Use It
- 1Persistent Annoyances: For recurring minor irritations that you choose or are forced to endure.
My upstairs neighbors are quite loud, but I put up with their music because they're generally very friendly.(Enduring noise for a social benefit).Students often put up with slow Wi-Fi in dorms because moving off-campus isn't financially viable.(Enduring inconvenience due to practical constraints).
- 1Difficult Individuals/Behaviors: When you tolerate a person's disagreeable traits or actions, often out of necessity, duty, or to maintain peace.
At family gatherings, we all occasionally have to put up with Uncle Barry’s unsolicited political opinions.(Tolerating an individual's behavior for social harmony).Managers sometimes put up with difficult employees if their skills are irreplaceable.(Enduring behavior for professional necessity).
- 1Unfavorable Conditions/Circumstances: When you must endure challenging or uncomfortable situations, often temporarily, or due to external factors beyond your control.
During the heatwave, everyone had to put up with stifling temperatures in their offices without air conditioning.(Enduring physical discomfort).Small businesses frequently put up with complex bureaucratic processes to comply with regulations.(Enduring administrative burden).
- 1Strategic Endurance/Compromise: In situations where enduring an unpleasantness is a conscious choice for a greater benefit or to avoid a worse outcome.
Partners in long-term relationships often put up with minor quirks or habits of each other for the sake of companionship.(Compromise in relationships).Many start-up employees put up with lower salaries in the initial years, hoping for future success and equity.(Enduring financial sacrifice for potential future gain).
When Not To Use It
- 1Enjoyable or Desired Activities: It is semantically incorrect to use
put up withfor things you like, enjoy, or actively look forward to.
- Incorrect:
“I really put up with going to that incredible concert last night.” - Correct:
“I really enjoyed going to that incredible concert last night.”(The concert was a pleasure, not a burden). - Incorrect:
“My passion for photography means I put up with spending hours editing photos.” - Correct:
“My passion for photography means I love spending hours editing photos.”(Editing is part of the enjoyment, not an endurance test).
- 1Situations Requiring Proactive Solutions or Immediate Action:
Put up withimplies a passive endurance, not active problem-solving. For genuine problems that demand resolution, or for dangerous/abusive situations, this phrase is entirely inappropriate.
- Incorrect:
“Parents should put up with bullying in schools.” - Correct:
“Parents must address bullying in schools.”(Bullying requires intervention, not tolerance). - Incorrect:
“You cannot simply put up with discriminatory practices in the workplace.” - Correct:
“You must report discriminatory practices in the workplace.”(Such issues demand action and systemic change, not passive endurance).
- 1Neutral or Unavoidable Natural Occurrences: For events or conditions that are simply facts of life, without implying a personal burden or resistance.
- Incorrect:
“Every winter, we put up with the shorter days and colder weather.”(While these are less desirable,put up withis too strong for simple natural cycles unless specific hardship is implied). - More appropriate:
“Every winter, we adjust to the shorter days and colder weather.”or“We experience shorter days and colder weather.”
- 1When Accommodating Guests or Offering Help: This is a common point of confusion due to the phrasal verb
put up(withoutwith), meaning to provide lodging. Ensure you distinguish between accommodating someone and enduring them.
“We put up our friends for the weekend.”(We provided lodging for them – positive/neutral).“We put up with our friends for the weekend.”(They were annoying, but we tolerated them – negative, often implies regret).
put up with selectively and accurately reinforces its meaning as a deliberate, albeit reluctant, act of tolerance in the face of adversity.Common Mistakes
- 1Separating the Phrasal Verb: This is perhaps the most frequent error.
Put up withis a non-separable phrasal verb, meaning its components must remain together. The object always follows the entire phrase.
- Incorrect:
“I can’t put your complaining up with.”(The objectyour complainingis placed incorrectly). - Correct:
“I can’t put up with your complaining.” - Why it's wrong: English phrasal verbs have fixed structures. Separable phrasal verbs allow objects to come between the verb and particle(s), but
put up withdoes not. Attempting to separate it creates an ungrammatical and unintelligible construction.
- 1Omitting the Object: As a transitive phrasal verb,
put up withabsolutely requires an object. You must specify what or whom you are tolerating.
- Incorrect:
“I just can’t put up with anymore.”(Missing the object). - Correct:
“I just can’t put up with this anymore.”or“I just can’t put up with such behavior anymore.”(Adding a demonstrative pronoun or a noun phrase provides the necessary object). - Why it's wrong: The verb
put up withdemands a direct recipient of the tolerance. Without it, the sentence feels incomplete and grammatically unsound, leaving the listener to guess what is being endured.
- 1Using for Positive Situations: As discussed,
put up withcarries a strong negative connotation. Using it for enjoyable experiences creates semantic dissonance and sounds sarcastic or illogical.
- Incorrect:
“She puts up with her dream job.”(Implies the dream job is actually a burden). - Correct:
“She loves her dream job.”or“She excels at her dream job.” - Why it's wrong: The inherent meaning of
put up withis to endure something unpleasant. When applied to something positive, it contradicts the meaning, leading to misinterpretation. Learners often transfer the idea of
2. Negatives and Contractions
| Full Form | Contraction | Example |
|---|---|---|
|
do not put up with
|
don't put up with
|
I don't put up with lies.
|
|
does not put up with
|
doesn't put up with
|
He doesn't put up with it.
|
|
did not put up with
|
didn't put up with
|
We didn't put up with it.
|
|
cannot put up with
|
can't put up with
|
I can't put up with this!
|
Conjugating 'Put up with'
| Tense | Subject | Form | Object |
|---|---|---|---|
|
Present Simple
|
I / You / We / They
|
put up with
|
the noise
|
|
Present Simple
|
He / She / It
|
puts up with
|
the noise
|
|
Past Simple
|
All subjects
|
put up with
|
the noise
|
|
Present Continuous
|
I
|
am putting up with
|
the noise
|
|
Present Perfect
|
She
|
has put up with
|
the noise
|
|
Future (Will)
|
They
|
will put up with
|
the noise
|
|
Gerund
|
N/A
|
putting up with
|
the noise
|
|
Infinitive
|
N/A
|
to put up with
|
the noise
|
Meanings
To accept or continue to accept an unpleasant situation or person without complaining, despite not liking it.
Tolerating People
Enduring the difficult personality, habits, or presence of another individual.
“She has to put up with her boss's mood swings every morning.”
“I can't put up with roommates who don't do their dishes.”
Enduring Conditions
Accepting physical environments or circumstances that are uncomfortable.
“We had to put up with freezing temperatures during the hike.”
“The commuters put up with daily delays on the subway line.”
Accepting Behavior
Allowing a certain type of conduct to continue without intervention.
“The school will not put up with bullying of any kind.”
“I've put up with your excuses for three months now.”
Reference Table
| Form | Structure | Example |
|---|---|---|
|
Affirmative
|
Subject + put up with + Object
|
I put up with his ego.
|
|
Negative
|
Subject + do not + put up with + Object
|
I don't put up with rudeness.
|
|
Question
|
Do + Subject + put up with + Object?
|
Do you put up with that?
|
|
Past
|
Subject + put up with + Object
|
Yesterday, I put up with it.
|
|
Continuous
|
Subject + be + putting up with + Object
|
I'm putting up with a lot right now.
|
|
With Gerund
|
Subject + put up with + Verb-ing
|
I put up with living here.
|
|
Modal
|
Subject + must/should + put up with + Object
|
You shouldn't put up with that.
|
Formality Spectrum
I am obliged to tolerate my colleague's unprofessional conduct. (Workplace)
I have to put up with my coworker's behavior. (Workplace)
I've got to deal with my coworker's crap. (Workplace)
I'm just vibing through my coworker's drama. (Workplace)
The 'Put up with' Ecosystem
People
- Annoying boss boss
- Noisy neighbors neighbors
Conditions
- Bad weather weather
- Traffic jams traffic
Tolerate vs. Put up with vs. Stand
Can I use 'Put up with'?
Is it annoying?
Can you change it?
Common Objects for 'Put up with'
Sensory
- • Noise
- • Smells
- • Bright lights
Behavioral
- • Lateness
- • Rudeness
- • Complaining
Examples by Level
I put up with the rain.
She puts up with the cat.
Do you put up with the noise?
They do not put up with it.
I have to put up with my noisy neighbors.
He puts up with a lot of work.
We put up with the small kitchen.
She didn't put up with the bad food.
I can't put up with your constant complaining anymore.
How long have you put up with that old car?
She puts up with working on weekends because she needs the money.
The teacher won't put up with students being late.
I don't know why she puts up with such a disrespectful partner.
We've had to put up with a lot of bureaucracy to get this permit.
If you want the promotion, you'll have to put up with some extra stress.
The residents are refusing to put up with the construction noise at night.
In this industry, you're expected to put up with a certain degree of instability.
I'm amazed at the sheer volume of nonsense he's willing to put up with for that salary.
The local government can no longer put up with the blatant disregard for environmental regulations.
Having to put up with his condescending tone was the final straw for me.
The diplomatic corps must put up with a myriad of cultural idiosyncrasies to maintain peace.
Whether the public will continue to put up with these austerity measures remains to be seen.
She has stoically put up with years of systemic neglect within the organization.
To succeed in academia, one often has to put up with the 'publish or perish' mentality.
Easily Confused
Learners often forget the 'with' and think 'put up' means tolerate.
Both mean tolerate, but 'stand' is almost always negative.
Both are three-part phrasal verbs starting with a verb and 'up with'.
Common Mistakes
I put with the noise.
I put up with the noise.
I put up the noise.
I put up with the noise.
I put up with.
I put up with it.
He put up withs the rain.
He puts up with the rain.
I put up with to wait.
I put up with waiting.
I putted up with it.
I put up with it.
I am put up with it.
I am putting up with it.
I put it up with.
I put up with it.
I can't put up with his late.
I can't put up with his lateness.
I put up with him to smoke.
I put up with his smoking.
I will no longer put up with you to treat me like this.
I will no longer put up with you treating me like this.
The situation was put up with by me.
I put up with the situation.
I put up with his behavior, but I don't tolerate it.
I put up with his behavior (which means I tolerate it).
Sentence Patterns
I can't put up with ___ anymore.
How do you put up with ___?
It's something you just have to put up with when you ___.
I'm not sure how much longer I can put up with ___.
Real World Usage
I'm able to put up with high-pressure environments and tight deadlines.
I can't put up with his drama anymore, honestly.
Why do we have to put up with these ads every 5 seconds?!
We had to put up with a 4-hour delay at the airport.
I won't put up with cold food when I'm paying for delivery.
I can put up with a small bedroom if the rent is cheap.
The 'With' Rule
Don't Split!
Use it in the Negative
Register Check
Smart Tips
Replace 'I don't like' with 'I can't put up with'. It sounds more specific and idiomatic.
Always check for the -ing. If you say 'put up with to...', it's a major giveaway that you're translating from your native language.
Use 'put up with' to describe your resilience, but follow it with a positive result.
Consider switching 'put up with' back to 'tolerate' or 'endure' for a more academic tone.
Pronunciation
Stress Pattern
In 'put up with', the primary stress is usually on 'up'.
Linking
The 't' in 'put' often links to the 'u' in 'up', sounding like a soft 'd' in American English (flap T).
Rising-Falling on 'UP'
I can't put UP with it. ↘
Conveys frustration or a limit being reached.
Memorize It
Mnemonic
Think of 'Putting' a heavy box 'Up' on a shelf and staying 'With' it even though your arms hurt.
Visual Association
Imagine yourself standing in the pouring rain with a small, broken umbrella. You aren't moving; you are just standing there, 'putting up with' the water hitting your face.
Rhyme
When things are bad and you must stay, you put up with them every day.
Story
John moved to a city with a lot of traffic. At first, he hated it. But he needed his job, so he decided to put up with the two-hour commute. He put up with the noise, he put up with the smog, and eventually, he just got used to it.
Word Web
Challenge
Write down three things you currently 'put up with' in your daily life (e.g., a slow computer, a long line at the coffee shop).
Cultural Notes
Often associated with the 'stiff upper lip'—the idea of enduring hardship without complaining.
Frequently used in the context of 'customer service' and what a consumer should or should not have to endure.
Used to describe 'soft skills' and the ability to work in difficult teams.
The phrase 'put up' has many meanings in English dating back to the 1400s, often related to 'storing' or 'placing'. The specific idiom 'put up with' emerged in the mid-1800s.
Conversation Starters
What is one thing about your city that you have to put up with?
Is there a habit of a friend that you find hard to put up with?
In your opinion, what should a professional never have to put up with at work?
How much noise can you put up with when you are trying to study?
Journal Prompts
Common Mistakes
Test Yourself
She has been ___ her noisy neighbors for three years.
Find and fix the mistake:
I can't put the cold weather up with anymore.
Choose the correct option:
I cannot tolerate his rudeness.
A: Your boss is so mean! How do you do it? B: ___
Select the valid object:
Match each item on the left with its pair on the right:
won't / I / that / with / up / put
Score: /8
Practice Exercises
8 exercisesShe has been ___ her noisy neighbors for three years.
Find and fix the mistake:
I can't put the cold weather up with anymore.
Choose the correct option:
I cannot tolerate his rudeness.
A: Your boss is so mean! How do you do it? B: ___
Select the valid object:
Match 'Put up with' to:
won't / I / that / with / up / put
Score: /8
Practice Bank
12 exercisesHow much noise can you ___ while studying?
We can't put anymore up with his rude comments.
Which sentence is correct?
No puedo tolerar el tráfico de la mañana.
Arrange these words into a sentence:
Match the situations with common things to 'put up with':
Are you willing to ___ a difficult work environment for a good salary?
He's putting up with to much pressure at his new job.
Select the correct usage:
Tuve que soportar el comportamiento grosero de los clientes durante todo el turno.
Form a complete sentence:
Match the reasons for enduring with the situations:
Score: /12
FAQ (8)
No, 'put up with' is a transitive verb, meaning it always needs an object. You must put up with *something* or *someone*. If the object is obvious, use 'it' (e.g., 'I can't put up with it').
It is neutral. It is perfectly acceptable in business meetings, emails, and casual conversation. 'Tolerate' is more formal/academic.
'Bear' is more formal and often used for heavy emotional suffering (e.g., 'I can't bear the pain'). 'Put up with' is for everyday annoyances.
No. Unlike some phrasal verbs, three-part phrasal verbs are always inseparable. The object must come after 'with'.
Quite the opposite! It implies you *don't* like it, but you are choosing (or forced) to accept it without complaining.
No, it is only used for unpleasant or annoying things. You wouldn't say 'I put up with this delicious cake'.
The meaning and grammar are identical in both dialects. It is a very stable idiom across the English-speaking world.
It is 'put up with'. The verb 'put' does not change in the past tense (e.g., 'Yesterday, I put up with his nonsense').
Scaffolded Practice
1
2
3
4
Mastery Progress
Needs Practice
Improving
Strong
Mastered
In Other Languages
aguantar / soportar
English uses a three-word phrase; Spanish uses one word.
supporter / tolérer
The English 'support' means to help, while 'put up with' means to tolerate.
aushalten / sich abfinden mit
German word order changes significantly in subordinate clauses, unlike English phrasal verbs.
我慢する (gaman suru)
Japanese doesn't use particles like 'up' to modify the verb's core meaning.
يتحمل (yatahammal)
The metaphor in Arabic is 'carrying' a burden, while English is 'putting' it 'up'.
忍受 (rěnshòu)
Chinese grammar is isolating; English phrasal verbs are a major hurdle for Chinese speakers.
Learning Path
Prerequisites
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