B1 · Intermediate Chapter 2

Reflexive Verbs for Life and Relationships

6 Total Rules
61 examples
6 min
Rules in This Chapter Quick Practice

Chapter in 30 Seconds

Master essential reflexive verbs to describe your daily life and meaningful relationships with native-level precision.

  • Distinguish between reflexive social verbs and their transitive counterparts.
  • Apply correct prepositional structures for graduation, dating, and moving.
  • Navigate everyday social scenarios from meeting friends to saying goodbye.
Speak about your life with authentic Portuguese rhythm.

What You'll Learn

Ready to truly elevate your Portuguese and express yourself like a native speaker? This chapter is going to be a game-changer! You'll dive deep into essential reflexive verbs that are at the heart of daily life and relationships. We'll unravel the nuances of 'Lembrar-se de' to elegantly recount memories and 'Esquecer-se de' to talk about forgetting, paying close attention to when to use that crucial 'de' and when to omit it – these details make all the difference! Planning to meet friends? You'll master 'Encontrar-se com' for arranging meetups, clearly differentiating it from simply 'encontrar' (to find an object). And when it's time to say goodbye, you'll confidently use 'Despedir-se de' to ensure you're not accidentally 'firing' someone! For talking about moving to a new home, 'Mudar-se' will become your go-to, ensuring you never confuse it with just 'moving' furniture. You’ll also learn how to use 'Aproximar-se de' to describe getting closer to someone, both physically and emotionally. And for those heartfelt moments, 'Apaixonar-se por' will teach you how to express falling in love beautifully. Finally, if you're looking to discuss your academic achievements, 'Formar-se em' will help you talk about graduating in a specific field with ease. By mastering these 8 rules, you'll be able to communicate more naturally and deeply about major life events, friendships, and romantic moments. Your conversations will become richer, more nuanced, and truly expressive. Let's get started!

Learning Objectives

By the end of this chapter, you will be able to:

  1. 1
    By the end you will be able to: Differentiate between 'encontrar' and 'encontrar-se' in social contexts.

Chapter Guide

Overview

Welcome to a pivotal chapter in your B1 Portuguese journey! This guide is designed to help you master essential Portuguese grammar related to reflexive verbs, allowing you to express yourself with greater nuance and authenticity, especially when talking about daily life and relationships. As you progress in Portuguese grammar, understanding these verbs is crucial for sounding like a native speaker. We'll dive into verbs like Lembrar-se de (to remember) and Esquecer-se de (to forget), highlighting the critical role of the preposition 'de'. You'll learn to differentiate between Encontrar (to find) and Encontrar-se com (to meet up with), and confidently use Despedir-se de (to say goodbye). We'll also cover Mudar-se (to move house), Aproximar-se de (to get closer), Apaixonar-se por (to fall in love), and Formar-se em (to graduate). Mastering these verbs will significantly enrich your conversations about significant life events, friendships, and romantic connections, making your Portuguese sound much more natural and expressive.

How This Grammar Works

Reflexive verbs in Portuguese, often called pronominal verbs, describe actions where the subject performs and receives the action. They are characterized by the use of a reflexive pronoun (me, te, se, nos, vos, se) that matches the subject. In this chapter, we focus on specific reflexive verbs that are indispensable for discussing life's milestones and relationships.
  1. 1Lembrar-se de: This means "to remember (of something/someone)." It requires the reflexive pronoun and the preposition de.
* Eu me lembro do nosso primeiro encontro. (I remember our first meeting.)
  1. 1Esquecer-se de: Similar to lembrar-se, this means "to forget (of something/someone)." It also uses the reflexive pronoun and de. The non-reflexive Esquecer means "to forget something" directly, without de.
* Ele se esqueceu do aniversário dela. (He forgot her birthday.)
* Eu esqueci a carteira em casa. (I forgot my wallet at home.)
  1. 1Encontrar-se com: Use this to express "to meet up with someone" by arrangement. The simple verb Encontrar means "to find" an object or "to encounter" someone by chance.
* Vamos nos encontrar no centro. (Let's meet downtown.)
* Eu encontrei um livro interessante. (I found an interesting book.)
  1. 1Despedir-se de: This means "to say goodbye to someone." It always takes the reflexive pronoun and the preposition de.
* Eles se despediram dos amigos no aeroporto. (They said goodbye to their friends at the airport.)
  1. 1Mudar-se: Use this verb specifically when you "move house" or "relocate." The non-reflexive Mudar means "to change" generally.
* Nós nos mudamos para um apartamento maior. (We moved to a bigger apartment.)
* Preciso mudar de roupa. (I need to change clothes.)
  1. 1Aproximar-se de: This means "to get closer to" someone or something, both physically and emotionally. It requires the reflexive pronoun and de.
* Ele se aproximou dela lentamente. (He slowly got closer to her.)
  1. 1Apaixonar-se por: To express "to fall in love with," you must use this reflexive verb with the preposition por.
* Eles se apaixonaram um pelo outro na universidade. (They fell in love with each other at university.)
  1. 1Formar-se em: This means "to graduate in" a specific field of study. It uses the reflexive pronoun and the preposition em.
* Ela se formou em engenharia civil. (She graduated in civil engineering.)

Common Mistakes

  1. 1✗ Wrong: "Eu lembro aquele dia."
✓ Correct: "Eu me lembro daquele dia."
*Explanation:* The verb lembrar-se is pronominal when meaning "to remember (of something/someone)" and requires both the reflexive pronoun (me, te, se, etc.) and the preposition de.
  1. 1✗ Wrong: "Nós vamos encontrar com nossos amigos."
✓ Correct: "Nós vamos nos encontrar com nossos amigos."
*Explanation:* When referring to arranging a meeting with people, the reflexive form encontrar-se com is the correct and most natural choice in Portuguese. The reflexive pronoun is essential.
  1. 1✗ Wrong: "Ele se apaixonou com ela."
✓ Correct: "Ele se apaixonou por ela."
*Explanation:* The verb apaixonar-se (to fall in love) always takes the preposition por to indicate the person one falls in love with, not com.

Real Conversations

A

A

Você se lembra da nossa viagem a Portugal no ano passado? (Do you remember our trip to Portugal last year?)
B

B

Claro que sim! E nos despedimos dos nossos amigos em Lisboa antes de voltar. (Of course! And we said goodbye to our friends in Lisbon before coming back.)
A

A

Ouvi dizer que a Maria se mudou para o Porto. (I heard Maria moved to Porto.)
B

B

Sim, ela se formou em arquitetura e conseguiu um ótimo emprego lá. (Yes, she graduated in architecture and got a great job there.)
A

A

Como o João e a Ana se apaixonaram? (How did João and Ana fall in love?)
B

B

Eles se aproximaram muito durante um projeto na faculdade e o resto é história! (They got very close during a university project and the rest is history!)

Quick FAQ

Q

What's the difference between esquecer and esquecer-se de in Portuguese?

Esquecer is transitive and means "to forget something" directly, without a preposition (e.g., Esqueci a chave - I forgot the key). Esquecer-se de is pronominal and means "to forget about something or someone," requiring the reflexive pronoun and de (e.g., Esqueci-me do compromisso - I forgot the appointment).

Q

When should I use mudar vs mudar-se in Portuguese?

Use mudar when you simply "change" something (e.g., Mudar de roupa - to change clothes). Use mudar-se specifically when you "move house" or "relocate" to a new place.

Q

Can I use encontrar to mean 'meet up with someone' in Portuguese?

While encontrar can sometimes imply a casual, unplanned encounter, for arranged meetings with people, it's much more common and natural to use the reflexive encontrar-se com.

Q

Is apaixonar-se always reflexive in Portuguese?

Yes, when expressing "to fall in love," it is always used reflexively with the pronoun (apaixonar-se) and takes the preposition por to indicate "with whom."

Cultural Context

These reflexive verbs are deeply embedded in everyday Portuguese conversations, especially when discussing personal experiences, relationships, and significant life events. Using them correctly is a hallmark of sounding natural and authentic. Despedir-se is a fundamental part of Portuguese social etiquette, while Apaixonar-se por is the standard, heartfelt way to express falling in love. Mastering these forms demonstrates not just Portuguese grammar proficiency but also a grasp of cultural nuances in communication. They are used universally across Portuguese-speaking countries.

Key Examples (8)

1

Nós nos encontramos no shopping às 15h.

We meet at the mall at 3 PM.

Meeting Up: Encontrar-se vs Encontrar
2

Encontrei-me com o chefe no elevador.

I ran into the boss in the elevator.

Meeting Up: Encontrar-se vs Encontrar
3

Eu me despeço de vocês agora porque meu Uber chegou.

I'm saying goodbye to you all now because my Uber is here.

Saying Goodbye (Despedir-se)
4

Ela se despediu dos seguidores no Instagram antes de viajar.

She said goodbye to her followers on Instagram before traveling.

Saying Goodbye (Despedir-se)
5

Eu me mudei para um apartamento novo ontem.

I moved to a new apartment yesterday.

Portuguese Moving Verb: Mudar-se (Getting a New Place)
6

Quando é que te mudas para Lisboa?

When are you moving to Lisbon?

Portuguese Moving Verb: Mudar-se (Getting a New Place)
7

O entregador está se aproximando da sua casa.

The delivery driver is approaching your house.

Getting Closer: Aproximar-se
8

Não se aproxime da borda!

Don't get close to the edge!

Getting Closer: Aproximar-se

Tips & Tricks (4)

💡

The 'Com' Rule

When using 'encontrar-se' to meet someone, always add 'com' before the person.
frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Meeting Up: Encontrar-se vs Encontrar
⚠️

The 'Firing' Slip-up

Never forget the reflexive pronoun (me, se, nos) unless you actually want to tell someone they are lost their job!
frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Saying Goodbye (Despedir-se)
💡

Pronoun placement

Remember: EP = after, BP = before.
frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Portuguese Moving Verb: Mudar-se (Getting a New Place)
💡

Preposition Power

Always pair 'aproximar-se' with 'de'. Think of it as 'approaching OF something'.
frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Getting Closer: Aproximar-se

Key Vocabulary (6)

encontrar-se to meet up despedir-se to say goodbye mudar-se to move house aproximar-se to get closer apaixonar-se to fall in love formar-se to graduate

Real-World Preview

calendar

Planning the Weekend

Review Summary

  • Encontrar-se + com + alguém
  • Despedir-se + de + alguém
  • Mudar-se + para + lugar
  • Aproximar-se + de + algo/alguém
  • Apaixonar-se + por + alguém
  • Formar-se + em + área

Common Mistakes

You forgot the reflexive pronoun 'me'. Without it, 'encontrar' means 'to find' by chance.

Wrong: Eu vou encontrar com meu amigo.
Correct: Eu vou me encontrar com meu amigo.

You need the preposition 'para' to indicate destination when moving.

Wrong: Vou me mudar casa nova.
Correct: Vou me mudar para a casa nova.

The correct preposition for academic fields is 'em', not 'de'.

Wrong: Ele se formou de engenharia.
Correct: Ele se formou em engenharia.

Next Steps

You have done an amazing job! Keep practicing these verbs in your daily thoughts, and you'll be speaking like a native in no time.

Write a diary entry using 5 of the 6 reflexive verbs.

Continue to: Identifying Objects: Him, Her, and It

Quick Practice (10)

Choose the correct sentence.

Which is correct?

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: Eu me encontro com ele.
Requires reflexive and preposition.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Meeting Up: Encontrar-se vs Encontrar

Choose the correct preposition.

Ele se aproxima ___ casa.

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: de
Aproximar-se requires 'de'.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Getting Closer: Aproximar-se

Find the error.

Find and fix the mistake:

Nós nos aproximamos a escola.

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: a
Should be 'da' (de + a).

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Getting Closer: Aproximar-se

Fill with the correct contraction.

Eu me aproximo ___ carro.

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: do
de + o = do.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Getting Closer: Aproximar-se

Fill in the blank.

Eu ___ para Lisboa.

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: a
Reflexive verb needed.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Portuguese Moving Verb: Mudar-se (Getting a New Place)

Fill in the blank.

Eu ___ um erro no documento.

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: encontrei
Transitive discovery.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Meeting Up: Encontrar-se vs Encontrar

Select the formal usage.

Which is more formal?

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: O prédio se encontra aqui.
Formal locative usage.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Meeting Up: Encontrar-se vs Encontrar

Choose the correct form.

Você ___ formou?

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: se
Você requires 'se'.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Graduating (Formar-se)

Choose the correct sentence.

Which is correct?

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: Eu me despeço.
Correct reflexive structure.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Saying Goodbye (Despedir-se)

Which is correct?

Qual frase está correta?

✓ Correct! ✗ Not quite. Correct answer: Eu me aproximo da porta.
Correct pronoun and preposition.

frontend.learn_grammar.from_rule: Getting Closer: Aproximar-se

Score: /10

Common Questions (6)

It makes the verb reflexive, meaning the action happens to the subject or between subjects.
Yes, but only if you are finding them by accident or searching for them.
Tchau is casual; adeus is final.
Yes, for 'despedir-se'.
Only if you mean 'to change' something else, not your house.
It depends on the region (EP vs BP).
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Reflexive Verbs: Actions on Yourself
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Identifying Objects: Him, Her, and It
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